30 | It's Been a Long Time..

Tue Aug 23 1:55AM

Since the last time I wrote a blog, I had recently lost my most recent relationship as well as one of two dogs that were in my life for 15 years. The most impactful thing that happened to me since then has been the passing of my closest friend for most of my adult life, Lucky.

I got Lucky a couple months after I turned 20. I got her on a whim, desperately wanting a canine companion once again. My best friend got his dog, Leo, the day after and they grew up together all the way up until Leo left this earth.

Throughout our time together, I wasn’t away from her for more than a week or two total. She was my reality, my rock, my best friend and confidante. Losing her was pretty much the hardest thing to deal with. Till this day, 9 months and 13 days after the last time I got to hug her, hold her, kiss her, love her and everything that I’ll never get to experience again.

Trying to figure out how to adjust to this new life and adapt to this routine I’ve built up for 15 years has been such a difficult thing to do. I find myself still going on the walks I use to take with her to somehow stay connected to the memory of when I was happiest; when I had my dog, my best friend, Lucky.

I’ve come to realize with that all I can do is remember the good times we had. I’ll never be able to be with her again but no one will ever be able to take away the time in history where we were a packaged deal. That’s something I can hold and be proud of. She was mine and I was her world.

I have to accept she’s not here anymore. I have to accept that our time was always finite and it came to its natural end. Looking forward, it’s still up in the air if I will have a good day or bad day. But if I can stay positive in my day to day, I can always be happy about what I had and appreciate everything in the moment because there’s no guarantee that I’ll have that moment ever again.

-JohnnyB theShooter